Something caught my attention this week that should catch my attention every week. There has been a common theme within the conversations about Thanksgiving among family and friends, Sunday School class, office associates, and social media.
One friend posted a picture with his wife of more than thirty years and expressed thanks that they had their first date some thirty years earlier on the posting. My son gave thanks for his wife, extolling the particulars of her contributions to his life. A dear friend gave thanks for his God’s gracious raising up his wife from three months in bed recovering from injuries sustained in a fall. A mother gave thanks for her children’s spouses. A friend who has no living family articulated thanks for three special friends who have ministered to him like family through two years of period illness.
Thanksgiving for the family has been a beautiful refrain. That refrain rippled from one member to the next at our Thanksgiving table last evening. And, this was not just ear-tickling for those assembled but included others across the US who were spending the Day with in-laws or friends being too far removed or taking turns with the other side of their families.
What makes family so special? Why the refrain of Thanksgiving to God? The most important reason is each person is made in the image of God and is placed in close relationship with one another by His divine providence. The second reason is that family is those with whom we are biologically connected and relationally for a lifetime. I have no living siblings. I have no living relatives. I am alone in this world in terms of my family of origin. However, I have a brother (in-law). Between graduate schools, we moved to Atlanta both to take a classroom break, be there for his senior year in high school, and get to know my in-laws (Frank and Betty) more intimately. It was an investment that has enriched my life.
I have two children and their spouses have added to my quiver. We could not be more thankful as we have observed repeatedly how they were just what our children needed as spouses. We give thanks for them regularly. We also gained additional family with them, as we have great relationships with them, their children, and their children’s spouses (obviously somewhat removed as the tree branched). Oh, how grateful we are for each of them.
So why this common refrain of thanksgiving to God? Well, first, family is His gift. Second, by His grace, our family has spared Cains and Ables. Second, we can trace His hand of providence in forming these families. Just in our immediate family, there are three amazing comings together to create three families—Pam and me, both preserved from other relationships maturing. Then both ended up at BJU, which neither had considered and God providentially orchestrated keeping us separated till our senior year, then very rapidly connecting us so that within little over a month, we decided to become engaged at Christmas.
Our daughter, at 18, went to work at summer camp after breaking off a serious relationship and not being interested in another one. On the day of arrival, a young man volunteers to help her and Pam unload and move into the dorm. Three weeks later, she brought him home for a weekend, and that relationship was quickly sealed, and two years later, they were married.
In his mid-twenties, my son had a two-year engagement that they mutually decided to end. The following summer, he came home and did an internship in Birmingham. The first Sunday of the summer he went with the singles group for an afternoon outing. That day he met Teresa and two years later married her.
The Lord put this family together by saving, preserving, and granting the wisdom to recognize His hand in our lives. To God be the glory for His great kindness in giving us our family. We give Him thanks.
He undoubtedly allows, within His sovereign plans, for people to make choices that have unpleasant consequences. Sometimes, He allows for the natural consequences of sin in the world to tear a family apart—like one of recent knowledge where mom died of cancer, leaving dad and three children under ten. So, if you are reading this and saying, “Why should I be thankful? Look at our messed-up family,” let me suggest that you focus on His grace extended to you to embrace His love and receive His gift of salvation. And, if you are a believer, then seek His wisdom to understand His direction for handling your messy family and seek His grace to respond to that messy family from a humble heart that chooses to forgive as you have been forgiven (Eph 4:31-32) and become the catalyst to right the ship while giving thanks for the opportunity to do so.
To God Be the Glory!